The Way We See Things

By Ginger Cockerham

One of the most important things I heard in a recent workshop was the presenter’s statement that, “the enemy of competency is surprise.” He said that in situations where we are surprised, we often react with assumptions and judgment instead of responding appropriately. When we assume that the way we see things, is the way they really are, our reactions can lead us to make mistakes.

I thought of a column I read in the Dallas Morning News highlighting a great example of assuming and judging. The columnist wrote that in the city, people are often in a hurry and sometimes go to ridiculous lengths to save time - like jumping out of their car at a red light to get something out of their trunk or back seat.

During rush hour recently a young woman pulled into a passing lane just as the light turned red. She popped out of her car and whirled around to get something out of the back seat. She was still reaching into the car despite the fact the turn signal was green. Angry motorists behind her blared their horns with some swerving around her car honking and hollering at her. When she pulled a small child out of the car who was choking and struggling to breath, drivers responded very differently. Suddenly, people were calling 911 and waiting to see if they could help.The way we see things is not always the way they really are!

1. When you experience a surprising situation, do you often react?
2. Do you assume that the way you see things is the way they really are?
3. Do your judgments sometimes prevent you from seeing the truth?
4. How willing are you to look at situations from different perspectives?
5. Are you open to explore at least three other possibilities?

My husband, Steve, and I recently committed to look at surprising and/or frustrating situations from at least three different possibilities before we respond. It is an amazing exercise that stretches our perceptions.

Ginger is a Master Certified Coach, Certified Mentor Coach. Please visit her web site athttp://www.coachginger.com/index.html

Arouse Your Heart

Think about the last decision you made. It could have been a big decision that took a lot of thought. Or maybe it was an unconscious or simple decision such as what you were going to have for lunch. Got that decision in mind?

Now ask yourself, “Did you consider what your heart wanted most?” The heart is the center of human life, your life. It’s the creative source of power within you. Your heart is the bridge between you and others, between your longings and reality. It’s the meeting place where “deep soul intimacy” is shaped in each of.

Unfortunately, life circumstances can just capture the attention of our minds and we learn to bypass our heart all together. My encouragement to you is to bring your heart into the simple and complex choices and decisions you make.

One way to do this is ask yourself, “Does this choice or decision bring me closer to what is valuable and important to me?” Your heart, the place of creativity, love, passion and connection to others, will guide you in life. It’s your best friend!

John Eldredge in his book, Waking the Dead wrote this,

“To find God, you must look with all your heart. To remain present to God, you must remain present to your heart. To hear his voice, you must listen with your heart. To love him, you must love with your heart. You cannot be the person God meant you to be, and you cannot live the life he meant you to live, unless you live from the heart."