The Way We See Things

By Ginger Cockerham

One of the most important things I heard in a recent workshop was the presenter’s statement that, “the enemy of competency is surprise.” He said that in situations where we are surprised, we often react with assumptions and judgment instead of responding appropriately. When we assume that the way we see things, is the way they really are, our reactions can lead us to make mistakes.

I thought of a column I read in the Dallas Morning News highlighting a great example of assuming and judging. The columnist wrote that in the city, people are often in a hurry and sometimes go to ridiculous lengths to save time - like jumping out of their car at a red light to get something out of their trunk or back seat.

During rush hour recently a young woman pulled into a passing lane just as the light turned red. She popped out of her car and whirled around to get something out of the back seat. She was still reaching into the car despite the fact the turn signal was green. Angry motorists behind her blared their horns with some swerving around her car honking and hollering at her. When she pulled a small child out of the car who was choking and struggling to breath, drivers responded very differently. Suddenly, people were calling 911 and waiting to see if they could help.The way we see things is not always the way they really are!

1. When you experience a surprising situation, do you often react?
2. Do you assume that the way you see things is the way they really are?
3. Do your judgments sometimes prevent you from seeing the truth?
4. How willing are you to look at situations from different perspectives?
5. Are you open to explore at least three other possibilities?

My husband, Steve, and I recently committed to look at surprising and/or frustrating situations from at least three different possibilities before we respond. It is an amazing exercise that stretches our perceptions.

Ginger is a Master Certified Coach, Certified Mentor Coach. Please visit her web site athttp://www.coachginger.com/index.html